Father Francis Maple
No stranger at the door
“St Peter?” asked Father Donald.
“Yes … St Peter,” repeated Father Ignatius, “what do you think he drank. Surely not coffee. It hadn’t been discovered then! When he was alive on earth.”
“Oh … boiled fish water, I shouldn’t wonder” laughed Father Donald, “must have tasted really horrible I should think!”
“And then …” continued Father Ignatius after a short pause, “and then, as if by magic, we were here in my office. I was sitting at my desk, like now, and he sat in the very armchair where you’re sitting in!”
Father Donald looked around him in the armchair and said nothing. Father Ignatius continued.
“St Peter sat just where you’re sitting Donald. He looked just like we’ve seen him portrayed in the movies. Tall guy and well set. With a beard and wearing a brown tunic … and sandals. I remember distinctly the sandals … Big man, he was … I wouldn’t wish to be on the wrong side of an argument with him. He was here in this office.
“He asked what I thought of him.
“I mumbled the usual things we’ve been taught in seminary … Loyal follower of Christ, leader of the Disciples, Head of the Church … That sort of thing!
“He smiled and picked up a biscuit … he preferred the chocolate covered ones and commented that they tasted different to the ones he was used to in them days … That’s exactly what he said … in them days!”
Father Donald raised an eyebrow and smiled, whilst Father Ignatius went on.
“Then he asked me to be honest. Not repeat what I’d been taught. What did I really think of him?”
Father Donald smiled once more and said nothing.
“Well …” Father Ignatius went on, “I hesitated of course … it’s quite a shock seeing St Peter face to face and being asked such a direct question …
“I said that some theologians consider him to be a bit irresolute of character … Tends to speak first, sometimes acts quickly, yet … a bit hesitant when the chips are down!”
“Wow …” said Father Donald, “did he hit you for saying that? He has a bit of a temper our St Peter you know.”
“No … he remained calm,” replied Father Ignatius, “He said ‘I don’t care about what theologians think … what do they know? I’m asking for your opinion Ignatius!’ He called me Ignatius … so he knew full well who I was. Then he asked me if I had any more of those brown covered biscuits …
“I gave him the whole packet of chocolate biscuits which somehow I had here in my desk; and then I said that I sympathized with his predicament and how he’d been portrayed by some theologians. He was and I’m sure he still is very loyal to Christ. He spoke first because of his confidence and beliefs in our Lord.
“He hesitated a little when he jumped into the lake and tried to walk on water. But anyone would have done that … Jesus had asked him to come to Him … so at least he did show real Faith by jumping into the water … but his Faith faltered … understandable really!
“And that’s when St Peter sat a little forward in the armchair and calmly said to me … ‘Quite the diplomat aren’t you Ignatius?’ I remember distinctly those words … and they were not said in a complimentary way either … He asked me to go on … what did I really and honestly think of him …
“So I swallowed hard Donald … I knew what he wanted me to say but I was too scared to say it. He nodded gently to encourage me …
“And very quietly I mumbled that he had denied Christ three times …
“He looked me straight in the eye and all gentleness seemed to have gone from his face. He waved his hand gently at me, still holding a half-eaten chocolate biscuit, as if to reprimand me … you know, as we do with our finger when we point at a little child, and then he said ‘After over two thousand years you people still hold that against me! And you call yourselves forgiving Christians … The Lord Himself forgave me with His knowledgeable look full of love and pity for me. But you Christians still bring this matter up …
“And it’s the same with Thomas … Whenever I meet him he says that the only thing that people remember about him is his doubting, and they can’t relate anything else he did after that.
“Well let me tell you something clever Ignatius that you are’ … That’s what St Peter called me, Donald. ‘Clever Ignatius that you are …
“Let me tell you something … Have you ever considered what would have happened if I did not deny our Lord? I would have most probably been taken by the crowd and hung from the nearest tree …
“They were horrible they were … and angry and wild. Those same people who pretended to love Him, whom He had healed and taught over the years suddenly became very wild. They became angry, almost feral … And of course I was scared. They were probably scared too, you know. They had to act this way because acting any differently would have resulted in them being hanged too!
“And by denying Christ, the Son of our God, I unwittingly set in course the chain of events which followed. Jesus knew exactly why I had to deny Him at the time of His capture.
“After His Resurrection, when He appeared to us on the shore of the lake as we were fishing; it was the third time Jesus appeared to us after He was raised from death … We had just eaten together, and Jesus asked me three times if I loved Him. And every time I said yes He asked me to take care of His lambs and His sheep!’ ”
After a short silence Father Donald asked “What happened then Ignatius? When St Peter told you that?”
Father Ignatius replied.
“Well, he finished eating his biscuit and then he asked me whether I thought I had done a good job of looking after Our Lord’s lambs and sheep …
“Before I could answer … I just woke up!”
“That’s quite a dream …” said Father Donald, “and quite a message from St Peter.
“Christ knew precisely why Peter had to be spared at the time of His capture … in order to lead the Disciples and the Church!”
Why is the FISH a symbol of Christianity?
As soon as they saw me all the sardines swam away leaving me alone in the sea as a subject of ridicule and fun. The chief-sardine said: "Oh it's him again ... let's get away as soon as possible!" and they all left at once!
Now sardines are not as clever as dolphins are they? Why else would they get into a tin and leave the key on the outside?
Every other canned fish you buy, tuna, salmon, pilchard and so on, you have to open with a can opener. But sardines ... they have a key on the outside. Why?
Unless of course you buy those tins with a ring pull. Again, on the outside ... so the sardines can't pull the ring and get out.
Anchovies aren't that much cleverer either. They thought they'd avoid capture by being so salty that no one would ever eat them. They were wrong. They've now become a delicacy much sought after and more fished than before. Who'd ever heard of anchovies on pizza before they became salty?
Come to think of it, most fish are somewhat stupid. They have the whole ocean to swim in and yet they swim into cans and tins and put a label on the outside to make themselves more marketable.
And now about the original question ...
Why is the FISH a symbol of Christianity?
The symbol of a fish was found on ancient Christian monuments and buildings. It represents Christ.
The Greek word for "fish" is ICHTHUS.
If we take the letters of that word they provide the first letters of other Greek words.
Iesous Christos Theou Uios Soter
Jesus Christ, Son of God, Saviour
So the symbol of the fish suggests all this to a Christian. It may well have been a secret sign used by early Christians to identify each other.
Reminiscing about False Teeth
Years ago I was a member of a group of entertainers. I presented the variety acts on stage and did a bit of stand-up comedy and chat with the audience. The shows consisted of pop music and songs, a bit of classic music and opera, old tyme “Victorian” songs, a bit of dancing and comedy sketches mainly written by me.
We rehearsed for ages beforehand and did our shows in church halls, old peoples’ homes, Women’s Institute Meetings and so on; to raise money for charity and to entertain the old folks.
A particular sketch came to mind out of the blue the other day.
Imagine if you will, on stage a number of men dressed as nuns, led by a tone-deaf tenor with a strong pronounced accent, singing this beautiful song from the Sound of Music.
Those tabs at the top
Q - What are those tabs or folders at the top of this Blog all about?
A – They are there to help you navigate your way through the Blog. Just click any of them and find out more.
Q – How much does it cost?
A – Nothing. They are FREE. Like everything else on this Blog.
Q – Can anyone use them?
A - Yes, of course!
Q – I am a vegetarian, can I use them?
A – Yes, anyone can regardless of their IQ or profession.
Q – Do I have to wear anything formal to use them?
A – It depends where you are. If you’re in a public place like work, Internet Café or using your laptop on a train, it is advisable that you are decently clothed. If you’re in the privacy of your own home you can wear what you like, or nothing.
Q – I am using my laptop at work. I am going home to click on the tabs.
Emmaus Valley
“Father, is it possible that God stops loving us?” Roger asked Father Ignatius.
The priest stopped what he was doing and asked, “What brought this on? It’s rather a strange question to ask.”
“Well Father,” continued Roger, “We’re told that God loves all of us. But is it possible that sometimes He turns His attention to someone else, and we’re not in His good books, or in His priorities anymore?”
“Feeling neglected are we … is that the problem?”
“No Father … it’s that … I don’t know … I seem to be down in the valley at this moment in time. Sometimes I’m right up there and I feel great and all is well … and then at times I feel really down and things aren’t going so well …”
“Aha … I see …” exclaimed the priest, “remember, that in order to be up there, as you put it, we must start from a low point.
“There are times when our Faith is really strong and we feel at one with God … and then at times, we begin to wobble and wonder and doubt …
“It’s usually when things aren’t going so well in our lives. Is that what is happening to you?”
Roger hesitated. “Perhaps … yes, I feel a bit fearful about life in general … will I still have my job this time next year, with the financial situation being what it is? How will I cope at my age? Would I get another job … you know the sort of worries we all have …”
Father Ignatius remained silent for a while, allowing Roger to think about what he had just said. Then he asked:
“I was reading Luke Chapter 24 Verse 13 onwards this morning. Do you know what it is about?”
Roger shook his head.
“It’s an unfair question I suppose … to expect you to know chapter and verse by heart … not even a priest can do that!” exclaimed Father Ignatius.
Roger smiled.
“Just after Christ’s Resurrection, two of His followers were going to Emmaus,” said Father Ignatius.
“They were totally distraught about Jesus’ death, and even though they had heard news that His tomb is empty and that Christ is alive, they were still down-hearted and confused.
“Jesus appeared to them on the way. They did not recognize Him. They spoke with Him and told Him their news. They said that their Lord and leader had been crucified, and there were rumors going around that He was raised from the dead and He was alive again.
“Jesus did not tell them who He was but explained to them the prophets’ predictions about Him. He walked with them all the way to Emmaus, but still they did not recognize Him. It wasn’t until He broke and blessed the bread that they recognized Him.”
The priest paused again for a while; and then he went on.
“Why? I ask myself.
“Why did they not recognize Him when they first saw Him, or when He took the time to explain to them the writings of the prophets?
“Could it be that their minds were more pre-occupied with their own problems and their dilemma rather than listening to Him?
“You can just imagine how their mind worked and how concerned they were about their predicament.
“Their leader is dead. What are they to do now? Is it all over? Every thing He said and taught comes to nothing? And what of the future? What are His followers to do now?
“Can you see how their mind was working Roger?”
“Yes … I suppose they were frightened about their future,” said Roger.
“Just like you …” said Father Ignatius with a gentle smile.
“We are all just the same as those two disciples at times …
“Sudden events may affect our lives and turn it upside down. Events perhaps of our own making sometimes … or events that we did not contribute to, but they affect us all the same.
“And we panic. We fear the future, we fear matters getting out of our control and we turn our attention to our problems and our dilemma. Just like those two on the way to Emmaus.
“And from being on a high up there with our Lord, we’re suddenly plunged into the valley you find yourself in right now.
“Yet, all the time we are panicking Jesus is there, walking right beside us. Quite literally! He is waiting for us to recognize Him, to trust Him, and hold His hand in the full knowledge that He will see us through our darkest hour.
“It is our doubts, our fears and our worries which prevent us from seeing Him.”
What pets see ...
Strange thing happened when I was out for a walk the other day. I met my friend Phil who was taking his goldfish for a walk. Yes, his goldfish. He places the goldfish bowl in a pram and walks round the park to give the fish a change of scenery.
I suppose it’s not as strange as me taking the dog for a walk. My dog is so lazy that he now stands on a skateboard and I have to pull him behind me with a rope. Every so often he gets off the skateboard, sniffs the aroma around a tree or lamp post and leaves his calling card before mounting the skateboard again.
Anyway, Phil and I got talking and he asked me the oddest question ever.
“Do you ever undress in front of your pets?”
What?
I must admit, I had never considered the question before; but Phil said that he noticed recently his goldfish acting most strangely and they became very agitated whenever he undressed.
I explained that looking through the goldfish bowl everything they see must be out of proportion with each other; so looking at him must be quite a shock. It’s like looking at those concave and convex mirrors in fairgrounds when different parts of the body look out of proportion to each other.
(At this point my mind was doing summersaults, as I suspect yours is doing right now!)
He thought about it for a while and then said “I mean … pets may be a different species to us humans but they still think, you know. Fish, dogs, cats, hamsters and the like … they see you with nothing on and they may well think and wonder what is going on!”
I thought about this for a moment and I was about to say something when Phil continued:
“Now whenever we take the goldfish bowl upstairs in the bedroom we cover it with a towel before we undress so as not to traumatize the fish!”
“You take the goldfish to the bedroom with you?” I asked incredulously.
“Yes of course, they are part of the family you know. We don’t just leave them downstairs in the TV room. But you haven’t answered my question. Do you undress in front of your dog?” he asked.
I looked at my dog enjoying another tree and said nothing. Perhaps I should conduct a survey about this I thought.
So, what do you think?
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